But is that what I am suppose to do?
All situations don't call for us to "be nice".
And when I really look at my motivation of being nice, I'm not sure it is really for the other person....I think it is a self motivation. I want peace....I don't want conflict.
But sometimes we need conflict. Sometimes we need to call people out on things. But we still need to do it in love.
Oh, but for me that is so hard.
I appreciated an article I read recently titled, "Jesus Didn't Call Us To Be Nice". In this article, Eric Hoke shared a story about how Jesus responded when Lazarus died.
Yet by examining the life of Jesus, the Son of God, we see that sometimes Jesus did things that were not “nice” yet fulfilled God’s purpose, a much higher calling than people pleasing will ever be.
In the story of Jesus raising his friend Lazarus from the dead, we see three components of Jesus’ character that can challenge us to live as He lived: Jesus said no. Jesus is honest. Jesus shows emotions besides happiness.
In the story of Jesus raising his friend Lazarus from the dead, even after hearing the news of his sickness, He waited two days to go visit. His disciples urged him to stay, as a while ago, the Jews tried to stone Jesus in Judea. Yet Jesus said no, not giving into the pressure of others, but keeping pace on accomplishing what God put in His heart to accomplish.
Martha and Mary were both deeply displeased with Jesus waiting so long to arrive, insisting that if Jesus were there, surely their brother would still be alive. But His purpose was not to keep Lazarus alive but to raise Him from the dead, thus showing the power of God. Jesus did not make up a story about getting lost when confronted by Martha but spoke honestly to her that her brother would live again—His purpose for coming.
Finally, when Jesus was in the midst of the family and friends grieving the loss of Lazarus, Jesus did not give a pious or proud rebuke. He did not spiritualize their pain with the phrase “It’s God Will.” He did not put His arm around them and say “everything is going to be OK.” No, as a result of His own troubled spirit in that moment, Jesus wept with those that were weeping, demonstrating his love for Lazarus to all that were gathered.
Read more at http://www.relevantmagazine.com/god/practical-faith/jesus-didnt-call-us-be-nice#DeJd7L04pwT82PIr.99
I need my motivation to be doing the godly, right thing, not the nice thing. I need my motivation to be about others, not about me. Here are some final remarks in Hoke's article.
Allowing Jesus to live through you will not necessarily produce “nice” but will undoubtedly produce “godly.” It will not be as pleasant, efficient or even safe, but it will be right and it will create a better follower of Jesus.