Brother Bill gave us this sibling assignment at the beginning of the year, and I am finally getting around to writing it and posting it. Here was the assignment:
I want to write a piece about why I am an Episcopalian. It
would be an essay explaining how I came to find a home in this denomination.
Write an essay explaining where you find your spiritual home and why.
As I ponder on this sibling assignment and being asked to
explain where I find my spiritual home and why, I realized I have never felt
like I had a spiritual home.
I feel like my Christian
walk has been a bit nomadic. It has
taken me to many different church “homes”, but I don’t think I have ever felt I
found a place that truly reflected my faith in Jesus Christ.
I grew up in the United
Church of Kellogg, a church that my parents chose for us to attend while we
were growing up. I loved being a part of
that church, and the youth group, and being a part of the church choir.
The summer after I
graduated from high school, I attended a church camp on Cascade Lake that would
change the course of my life forever.
God did a miraculous work in my life at that camp, changing my mind and
spirit in a unique way. I came back
changed.
A week or so after
returning from church camp I was heading off to participate in sorority rush at
the University of Idaho. I was not only
navigating my way through starting college, but also navigating my way through
this spiritual transformation that had recently happened in my life.
While in college, I
never really found a home church. I went
to a different church every year I was in college I think. But I did have a bit of a constant “spiritual
home” with Campus Crusade for Christ”, a Christian ministry I was involved with
all through my college years.
My first job out of
college was in a town called Glendive, Montana.
I attended a few churches while in Glendive, and ended up at the
Evangelical Church of North America. One
of the secretaries at the college I worked at attended this church, and so I
chose to attend church there. I soon
became involved in helping with the youth at the church. Paul, who joined me a year later, and myself
did a lot of growing up in this church. Paul was asked to be the associate
pastor at the church after we lived there a few years, and he became ordained
and was the associate pastor for a few years before we left Glendive. We learned some great teaching and some hard
lessons about people and the church. We
learned it was possible to attend a church with fellow believers whose doctrine
didn’t quite align with your own. (This
would be a continuing theme through our married life as we attended different
churches.)
After leaving Glendive
we moved to Meridian, the town Paul spent most of his growing up years. His grandfather was the pastor of Meridian
Gospel Tabernacle, a church his grandfather founded and pastored. Paul was hired on as a youth pastor, and we
spent many years ministering to the youth in this church. When we moved there, Paul’s brother Kent was
the associate pastor, and his dad pastored a church in Kellogg, Christian Life
Center. In 1995, his brother and his dad
switched places. Paul’s parents moved
back to Meridian, and his brother’s family moved to Kellogg, and they switched
roles.
In 2000, God made it
very clear that we were to move to Kellogg by providing Paul a job as the
Director of the Silver Valley Alternative High School. When we arrived in Kellogg, we became a part
of Christian Life Center where Paul’s brother Kent was the pastor. A couple years later, Kent and his wife Robin
moved from Kellogg and relocated in Oregon.
We stayed at Christian Life Center a few more years, until, again, God
made it clear it was time to leave and attend another church.
This happened in
2011. We then returned to the church
where I grew up in, but now it has a different name. It is called Mountain View Congregational
Church. After attending for about a
year, Paul and I became involved in the worship team and later took on some
leadership roles in the church. This is
where we continue to attend today.
But do I feel like any
of these churches were or are my spiritual home? Not really.
Even though we were a
big part of each congregation or ministry we were a part of, I, personally
don’t feel like I have quite found my spiritual home as a Christian.
My sister Christy finds
her spiritual home in nature, as you can read about here.
Bill also mentions
nature as being spiritual as he tells of his Episcopalian spiritual home here.
In Christy’s essay, she
wrote a definition of a spiritual home as a place where one feels a strong
sense of belonging.
For me, I love being out
in nature, but I do not experience it as a spiritual experience like my sister
or brother.
Have I ever had any type
of spiritual home where I have felt a strong sense of belonging? The closest thing I have experienced in my
life is performing a play on stage.
There have been times where I felt like what myself and my cast members
where involved in a spiritual experience.
Two times I felt this way were in the performance of “Godspell”, and the
other was “Shadowlands”.
As I read and have
listened over the years to Bill talk about his experience in the Episcopal
Church, a part of me is drawn to that liturgical type of worship. I love the ritual of a Catholic Mass. But I can find God in most churches and
church services I have attended, and know He is present within the people who
attend there.
Maybe Paul and I will
never find a church body that will be our spiritual home. I have a close and
personal relationship with God and his son Jesus, and I know I trust them and
have fellowship with them and have practically my whole life. But a part of me does yearn for that “tribe”
of believers who could provide for me that spiritual home as a place where I
feel a strong sense of belonging. But
either way, it does not diminish my relationship with my Heavenly Father.
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